Showing posts with label Humour. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humour. Show all posts

Big Bad Automation

I read it once that the term Automation came from a Greek term "Automatos" which means "Self-Acting". The Self-Acting part, is what fascinated me the most. I started to think of ROBOT with brains(no processor). I imagined machines which could do anything done by a human manually.




My thought process didn't end there. First i started thinking of devices/machines which could do basic stuf like sharpen a pencil. Then i thought, of a machine which could actually use that sharpening machine to sharpen the pencil. Then i thought of a machine which will produce pencils. And so on.

This eventually led me to a model where there is an Eco-system where there is input(minimal) and there is output. the rest of the equation should be a black box. This kind of sounded like factory automation.

As i observed the world around me, i realized that the word "Automatos" was no longer a word.
Its because of this word, that we are what we are today. We will fail if we don't have automation in out eco-space.

The reason is simple. Efficiency.
Or is it?

It is known and a well accepted fact that Human or animals for that matter, are the most efficient machines created by God. The only input is few ounces of calories and the output is unlimited supply of "I COULD NOT FIND A SUITABLE WORD"



Then why is man, trying to replace the most efficient machine on this planet.

This has many answers. Man cannot work like a car or a Television or an Air conditioner.
He cannot replace a website with his palm.
I am convinced that as part of evolution, Automation has been integrated and injected our worlds. As a mater of fact, Automation has its own evolution.

The word Automation has been highly under-rated (Due to IT syndrome, I guess)
Right from the first 2+2 calculator to huge Boeing work-shops, every thing is about Automation.

ARE WE LAZY?
NO. WE WANT TO BE FAST and BIG and that too QUICKLY



Next thing which will probably shoot in you mind, is,
HOW TO AUTOMATE AUTOMATION!!  He Ha Ha(Like Devil)


{Please Leave you Comments Below} 


My First Troll Based Humor Post



How to make my first TROLL BASED HUMOR POST?

What is Troll face?

First its important to under stand what is TROLL
For that it would be convenient to check out this WIKI link
Of course there are articles on the web which explains "The-History-of-Trollface" but i don't think anyone want to go that deep.


Its certain that these faces are inspired from actual faces of some of the most expressive people on the planet.

For example




HOW DOES IT HELP?

People want to express there thought and also effectively. Its always better to add some visuals to your texts.
And troll faces is one of the most effective add-on on the modern blog writing. It attract people's attention from miles.

'Texting' around the troll faces is as much important as the faces itself.
You don't want your readers to over burden with unnecessary text. THE TEXT HAVE TO BE PRECISE AND SHARP LIKE AN ARROW. LET YOUR TROLL FACES DO THE TALKING.

WHERE DO I GET TROLL FACES.
This is a simple one. You can visit this site.


The most popular one.





How does the end result look like?

Well if all goes well and you do a decent enough job in MS-Paint, then you are supposed to rock the work and get 100's of Likes and 100's of shares.
PS: Be patient.


Salaried Wife. What an Idea Mantrijee!

जी मंत्रीजी !

The Union Ministry of Women and Child Development is mulling to prepare a draft that would make it mandatory for the husband to pay a definite amount of his salary to his wife each month.

महिला एवं बाल विकास मंत्रालय में इस बात पे सोच विचार हो रहा है कि पत्नियों को पति की salary में से कुछ हिस्सा मिलना चाहिए। मंत्रालय इस सम्बन्ध में जल्दी ही एक प्रस्ताव पेश करेगा।

अच्छा है, हमारे देश में अकलमंदी के काम काफी तेज़ी से होते हैं। मंत्रालय की ये सोच है की इससे महिलाओं का empowerment हो जायेगा। Empowerment करने के लिए ये plan है कि घरेलू औरत का designation हाउस-वाईफ से गिराके हाउस-मेड का कर दिया जाए। पत्नी के पास पैसा आ जायेगा तो सब तकलीफ ख़त्म। आखिर सब problem ही पैसे की है।

इस idea को पूरी तरह से कारगर बनाने के लिए मेरे 7 सवाल हैं:
  1. विवाह के 7 वादों को हटा कर क्या offer letter सिस्टम लागू किया जायेगा ?
  2. हर साल का increment कितना होगा ? Annual Performance Rating कैसे निकली जाएगी ?
  3. पति के क्या क्या हक होंगे ? पत्नी की क्या क्या जिम्मेदारियां होंगी ? अच्छा खाना ? साफ़ सफाई ? अगर पति बीमार होगा तो पत्नी को दवाई लानी होगी ? बच्चों का homework कराना होगा ? क्या पत्नी को पति के साथ parties/dinners में जाना ज़रूरी होगा ?
  4. अगर पत्नी को खाना बनाना नहीं आता तो क्या उसकी पगार कम होगी ?
  5. साल में कितने दिन की छुट्टी मिलेगी ?
  6. अगर बच्चे फेल हो गए तो कौन जिम्मेदार होगा ?
  7. क्या कामवाली बाई को रखकर काम outsource कराया जा सकता है ? उसकी पगार कौन देगा ?
उम्मीद है कि इन बिन्दुओं को ध्यान में रखके सरकार एक सशक्त कानून बना पाएगी।

अपडेट : सुना है कि कामवाली बाई अस्सोसीएशन ऑफ़ इंडिया की ये मांग है की घरों में उन्हें भी पत्नी के बराबर के हक और सम्मान मिलना चाहिए।

जय हिंद !


Cricket will miss Rahul Dravid

Rahul Dravid
Born 11 January 1973 (1973-01-11) (age 38)
Indore, Madhya Pradesh, India

Not many people know that Dravid's middle name is "Sharad" but they surely know that he was one of the best middle order batsmen.


All of cricket knows that Rahul Dravid, THE WALL, is one of the classy cricket players, of both Test and ODI, in the entire world.
He has set landmarks which are not immortal but surely eternal.
Rahul Dravid has been a keeper, a batsmen, a bowler, a captain, a vice captain and also a mentor, and has played and won for India endless number of times.



Today, 9/16/2011, he has decided to move on and is retiring from the ODIs. His contribution towards cricket will always be remembered.

EDIT: The news of Rahul Dravid's retirement has shocked Indian cricket fans. Curtains have been drawn on the reliable wall of Indian cricket. (09/03/2012)
[News Item]

Sign of Profession (?)

In Julius Ceasar, Act I, Scene I, Shakespeare wrote:

FLAVIUS:
Hence! home, you idle creatures get you home:
Is this a holiday? what! know you not,
Being mechanical, you ought not walk
Upon a labouring day without the sign
Of your profession? Speak, what trade art thou?
First Commoner:
Why, sir, a carpenter.
MARULLUS:
Where is thy leather apron and thy rule?
What dost thou with thy best apparel on?
What are the common signs of profession that people carry with them today? First thing that comes to my mind is the civil/mechanical engineer's cap:

Others might think of a carpenter's screwdriver/pencil, a plumber's wrench etc.

                          
Being an engineer myself, I tried to imagine how a computer science engineer might be identified when you see him/her on the streets? Carrying a laptop? Wearing glasses(!!)? I almost started to think that we just do not have a proper sign of profession. But then true light dawned:
If you see him too much on the streets, then probably he is not a computer engineer.
(c) Scott Adams